Return.

Recently, i thought that i have already let it go and put it down.
Without him and the story, i can still continue my life happily.
I have a crush and the crush fade with miracle.
Except for the loong loong exams war, i'm totally satisfied with my life.
Frankly.

These condition continue until a friend told me about the recent buddha day and asked me to get back the person's number. i symphatised and i helped. i sms him and everything so far okay.

During the buddha day, i'm very admire when i saw all of them are soo united when they tried their best to get the best. I'm one of the committe too and i try my very best to help.
He is busy too. I can see it through his eyes.
His tiredness made an injury in my heart.
My heart is pain when i knew he fall sick. This uncontrolled feeling made me contribute more to help him. I ran, i tried and i prayed.The feeling is returned.
I pour all my love, effort, sincere and loyalty again,without asking for any rewards.

However,he tried to escape and stayed away. I can't approach anymore. I knew that i can do nothing with only unilateral. Without measurable reason, i still help indirectly with all my energy. I'm tired and i'm hurt. It is not because of the ended story,but because of his attitude,he is as cold as ice. He alienated me. Moreover, he tried to show his happiness with his gang.

In a nutshell, what i pour is actually what i get to hurt myself.

MyDear,
I'm not angry with you from the very beginning.
I treat u with all my heart,from the beginning until now.
I'm worry with u and i tried to help.
I pour all my sincere,effort and love.
Please do not stay away,don't treat me like a ''pass-by''er.
Don't even break the friendship bond and let me hate u.
We are still fiends.
Without u, i will lose my source of hurt with pain, but u will lose a person who loves u eternally.


I bet to myself if u don't reply me, i will let go and put down or even stay away from u. Now,i lost in the bet. Thanks Buddha for giving me the signal to continue my life.
I hope that i can let it go this time,permanently.
Amitabha.


IT IS OVER,WITH NO RETURN.